Betty, as her friends called her, was a very practical lady. She dislikes leaving things to chance. She was pretty and intelligent and this attracted people of both genders to her. She had friends and was the toast of her family because she did so well in school.
It was no surprise that in her final year, her longtime boyfriend, Fred, proposed. They had been dating since 100level. She made him understand her vow to remain a virgin as her Christian upbringing demanded and He obliged, and even attended fellowship with her in school where she led the choir. It was a blessed union, according to their classmates, until the holidays came.
Betty’s mum had encouraged her to spend it in Abuja with her elder sister who introduced her to Tami, their new neighbor. Tami was a party girl. She knew all the happening places and found Betty’s ‘Christianity’ interesting. They soon were inseparable as they brought a newness to each other’s life especially since they were both ‘practical’.
Tami made Betty understand that in life, God has given us our free will to take some decisions. Like, in our choice of a spouse, as no one wants to suffer; she convinced Betty that she needed a ‘made man’. She could not wait for Fred to graduate, serve, find a job and then save to start planning a family. Betty saw reason, being a practical girl and thinking that as an adult, life’s decisions can’t be prayed for.
So, it was no surprise that she returned to Benin, a new lady with a new boyfriend… Bala. Bala was already running his father’s company and was a Harvard graduate. Betty was so proud of him, but kept him a secret. It was no surprise too that on her birthday that year, just months before graduation, Bala proposed to Betty in a stylish way.
She travelled to Abuja to see him on the pretense that her sister called for her. He had a trip planned for them. He had booked a flight to Dubai and they flew business class to Dubai. It was an experience of a lifetime for Betty. At midnight, he pulled out a beautiful diamond ring and proposed to her and without thinking, she said “Yes”, jumping on him
I mean, diamonds are a girl’s best friend and here she was with her own real diamond! Fred had proposed with words… no ring. Everything was so glamourous that she didn’t realize she had compromised her vow until the day after when she was all sore. She cried but with the belief that she had given it up to her ‘husband’ and with that, she tried to enjoy the rest of her trip.
On getting back to school, Fred had found out about her little rendezvous. As he couldn’t reach her on her birthday. He broke up with her as he called her a cheat and a liar, she was deeply hurt as she now realized she was not attracted to Bala. She had just been carried away by the material things; she really loved Fred who had been true to her.
Her friends noticed something different about her and they told her, she wasn’t herself as she was filled with guilt. Worse was when it dawned on her that Bala was Muslim and even though it seems they had a life together, they actually didn’t. He had told her she would have to convert and she knew in her heart that she couldn’t. This affected her badly.
In our bid to ‘live life’ we often forget about the consequences of our actions. We live in the moment and not in the totality of the moment. Betty had a good life but she let the ‘moment’ take control. She gave in to lust for the things of the flesh. We might condemn her but deep inside, we all worship something material and if we are not careful, they take over our faith.
Money, gold, flashy cars, exotic holidays, diamond rings are material things we all long for which the devil can use to steal us away. “Watch and pray”, is not just a statement, it is a watchword, telling us to reflect on things before we make decisions.
Woman, know thyself is not just a topic, it is a call to action that we must never forget that we can make or break who we are.