She Is Not All That

Growing up, my Mum taught me to be loving, humble and submissive. She said a woman was meant to serve her husband and sons. On the other hand, my Dad taught me to be strong, self-assured and ambitious. He said women should know their worths so men do not take them for a ride.

Growing up as a teen, I had friends who told me we were supposed to be soft, sexy and sensitive. If not, a man wouldn’t find us attractive. They told the fairy tale of a damsel in distress and how Prince Charming is to save them.

Then I became a young lady and stumbled into feminism; What a man can do, a woman can do 10 times better! We did not need men for anything except to have babies so we were to work hard and prove to them that we could be better. Actually, we could best them and that, we did.

So many conflicting expectations!

When I look back to the stories in the Bible, I see timid women, strong women, bold women and angry women.
I see Eve as bold and daring though it temporarily cost us eternal life but her actions tell me the men are really ‘the weaker sex’ because she convinced him despite the divine warning Adam had received.

Then I look at Sarah who made Abraham sleep with her maid and he did – even though it was obviously the wrong thing to do.

What shapes us?

Rebecca was bold. Mary was bold! I mean, a virgin ready to carry and birth an unknown child just having faith that He was the chosen one! Can I be like these women?

I look at the world we live in now and see how we struggle to define who we are as women and wonder, are we all that? Are we as timid as the popular Dove advert is campaigning against? Is it wrong to be feminine, soft and humble?
Are we as ruthless as some of the Western media portrays us to be? Heard the saying: ‘hell hath no fury like a woman scorned’? Don’t the men also take revenge when betrayed?
Should we sit back and let our husbands treat us as slaves in our own homes or fight back and take a stance…dominate him/move out/divorce?

Who are we meant to be?

I’d really like to hear your thoughts, as well as the source of your stance, be it the Bible or science amongst others.
Join the conversation on Instagram with your answers.

Cheers ladies!

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