Understanding The Help-Meet

We discussed the “Measure Of A Man” last week & we exemplified Joseph’s life (Matt. 1:18-22). We compared Joseph’s life with that of another man called Nabal (1 Sam. 25). We saw that personal character, personal choice & nobility starts from bachelorhood & Joseph demonstrated that.

Now, who do we understand a “help meet” is?

A help meet is a “helpful” “companion”. (Gen 2:18). Helpful: giving or ready to give help. With the following useful synonyms: friendly, pleasant, caring, benevolent.
Companion: A person or something you spend a lot of time with or with whom one travels. According to the dictionary, Companion may also mean:
1). Each of a pair of things intended to complement or match each other; or
2). To accompany on a journey.

The idea of a woman being conceived as a “necessary evil”, as far as God is concerned, is an incorrect idea. When God made pronouncements on Eve at the fall, he didn’t say she was a necessary evil.

A woman is 2 things at the same time. While the man is who he is, she is:
1). A bundle of emotions. Her greatest need in any relationship is emotional. It’s the reason why she cries over everything.
2). She is a bag potentials. If largely understood she has enormous capabilities.

Both emotions & potential are maximized through “communication”. Learn to reconcile yourself to the facts of your relationship or marriage. If you marry a character flaw/strength in a person, the full package is accentuated in marriage. What you find now is what you get.

Proverbs 31 was written by King Lemuel’s mom either from an expectation or a personal experience. She was literally saying a woman comes into the life of a man for a reason.

The first foundational problem in a relationship is to come into it with the wrong attitude or motive, especially the attitude of “to get & not to give”.

Proverbs 31 rolled out the qualities of a good woman, whether married or single, but I think Abigail in 1 Sam. 25:3 was a reflection & summary of this woman. A woman who is enterprising, strong & yet delicate. Beautiful yet with her unique weaknesses.

There are reasons why bible emphasizes on physical apperance of a woman, Sarah, Rebecca etc. We use makeup to augment physical appearance these days.

The woman has the ability to multitask. She does what a man cannot do. That’s her design.

A woman has verbal power both to build & destroy. Her tongue is laden with potentials. That’s why she seeks communication in relationships. It’s her design. She wants to talk.

She wants security for family. It’s the reason she’ll step in to help her partner anytime there is a threat.

She is very intuitive. Great sixth sense. Learn to listen to her especially if you’ve invested in her long enough. We loose about 50% of our opportunities when we don’t leverage on her intuitive gifts.

She has capacity for endurance. She will endure with you as long as she trusts you.

She’s overtly protective of the guys in her life especially her boo. We call it “jealousy”.

If you were led by God to marry your spouse, why will you try to run your marriage without His leading?

Many women believe men will cheat & thus becomes overly suspicious.

If your spouse enjoys more measure of peace when he’s not home, there is a big issue already. That’s why it’s possible for him to cheat. Why is it easy for a girlfriend to steal your spouse?

A Good marriage is not a promise from God, only those who obey the terms of the covenant of marriage enjoy it.

#XL

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